Tomorrow will mark the one month anniversary of working in the airport. I can't believe it. I swore that I would be there for only a week. Remember? But here it is, almost a month later. Thank goodness for it. I'm still not 100% in love with being there, but I am 100% in love with getting paid every week and being able to do some things that I wasn't able to do last year around this time. I've been able to give my mom $100 every week and buy groceries too. That diminshes the desire to eat out. I spent a little more than I would've liked too this past week on groceries but, most of my bills (car insurance, Dell Preferred Account, NetFlix) are up to date.
I went to the doctor and found out that I lost 10 lbs. Not as much as I would've liked to have lost, but at least it's a start. A very small smart. Well whatever. At least I'm not 10 lbs. heavier. I really need to start taking those before and after pictures. I need to do some much. After I get home from work, I really have no desire to do anything else but sit on my arse. I'm a bit hesitant about joining the gym being that I won't be able to go until the weekend. Spending $100 for six months when I only get there twice a week really doesn't make much sense. I walk a lot still and I eat fruit and drink water. I've gotten slack on eating veggies and portion controls, but I 'm going to try and motivate myself back to where I was a couple of months ago. Still no French Fries, ice cream, chocolate, or hamburgers. I usually have a meatball and mozzarella Lean Pocket for lunch, but that's as far as I go for beef. Anyone who knows me know that aside from music, hamburgers and french fries are my f#*&%king weakness!!! Always has been and probably always will be, but thank goodness, I haven't had a taste for them lately.
Over the weekend, I saw on the Bloomberg channel that both eBay and Google are cutting jobs like no one's business. WTF!!! This makes me wonder if I am destined to reside in the glamorous world of HR for the rest of my life. Either there or in the underappreciated and overwhelming world of education. I don't think I mind teaching as much, but I did not get an advanced degree to work in either field. I realize that in all areas of life, you definitely have to crawl before you can walk, but you guys have no idea how frustrating this all is. Knowing that 30 is around the corner, damn there staring me in the face, and I have very little funds to show for it, scares the shite out of me and angers me. I really want my independence and to know what it's like to stand on my own two feet, but right now, I know it's not feasible. And yes folks, that's why I'm angry. I blame myself for not being frivolous enough with money in the past. I would probably be in a completely different situation if I would've disciplined myself to save better. Maybe I wouldn't have a house, but I would probably have my own apartment and have some independence where I can entertain (especially men!), decorate, and occupy my own space with worrying about things a 30 year old woman should not be concerned about. I dunno. There is indeed a pro and con to everything. And like I said, this is my life right now and I have to make the best of it until I can do better. I just hope I will be able to do better soon.
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